Are You A Parent In Pain?

All parents experience pain. It’s inevitable in any parent-child relationship because the child “needs” to behave according to his/her preference even though it conflicts with his/her parents’ needs.

I remember sometime ago when my teenage daughter, Christine, went home late at night in spite of my expressed restriction and “need” to protect her. I got mad! Unfortunately, I handled the conflict too emotionally and instinctively that I came across as a dictator. From thereon, I keep learning from mistakes and improving as a parent in pain myself.

Conflict is part of life and not necessarily bad in the parent-child relationship. It has the potential to strengthen the relationship or pull parent and child together into a closer union. Unfortunately, most parents try to resolve their conflicts with their children by using only two basic ways — being a “dictator” or being a “doormat.” Both of these are ineffective. They are damaging to the child as well as the relationship.

Perhaps by having a credential of being a recovering “wounded child” and “parent in pain” myself, I could help more parents and children go together in genuine friendship and respect. Not just in theory or clinical perspective, but in “experienced reality” as well.  That is my hope.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s