Looking for Mr. Goodbar

I don’t know if you’d watched the movie, “Looking for Mr. Goodbar.” Theresa is a character there who leads a double life. By day, she is a teacher in a school for retarded children. In the evenings, she cruises bars and nightclubs to pick up men and have sex with them.

Once in the movie, she invites a bartender for a drink. The bartender refused saying he does not drink because when he does he is unable to stop. Theresa responds, “I have that trouble with men.”

I’m reminded of a patient, John, who told me his own story of sex addiction. His story started with all the precursors of this type of addiction. Such includes parental abuse and abandonment, problems with drugs and alcohol, and sexual traumas. John’s sex addiction is frequently physical sex with prostitutes and strangers.

Finally John found therapy and therapeutic communities and support groups to start healing his sex addiction. He is beginning to work up the roots of his addictions and leave the life he had led.

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