The psychology of interpersonal communication says that almost 90% of communication is body language. Non-verbal, in one word. So if you desire to communicate well to others, learn to be non-verbal.
I have a counselee who is 56 years old. He told me, “Doc, my Mom never touched me in my whole life. But you taught me in our session that if your parent doesn’t touch you, we should take the first step and embrace her first.”
“That’s healing,” I said.
“Well, I did that. But my 80+ Mom just ignored my embrace. She moved my hands away. So I’m still waiting for her to embrace me after all these many years.”
It’s disappointing, I know. My counselee carries with him the psychological and emotional wounds of a mother who does not show her care and love through non-verbal touch.
I believe that our biggest wound isn’t deprivation of physical food or money. I believe our biggest wound is love deprivation. As noted psychiatrist Dr. Karl Menninger put it, “love is the medicine for the ills of mankind.”
And one of the most important ways of expressing and giving love is non-verbal. Even through our skin. Our skins hunger for the touch of love.
Make a healing choice today to love by touching, holding hands, embracing.